Eavesdropping

today i listened to a couple in their 30s talk at the park. they're seated about 8 feet to my right watching the sunset. talking about life, high level. the guy had a pretty nice voice and seemed capable of putting words together so i took off my headphones and just listened to them.

i couldn’t hear what the girl was saying but it didn’t matter. he was trying to help her put her life back together. the kind of high level “What-do-you-want-how-will-you-get-it” conversations I find myself in so often. 

she’s a 4th grade teacher. She suffered some blunder at work. Someone thinks she’s racist. Hilarious. The guy asks: if not here, where do you want to go? I can work from anywhere. Chicago, Boston? He sounds creative and articulate and potentially wealthy. Music to my ears.

i then learn that he’s a consultant. Makes sense. He offers advice for a living. But this is clearly a relationship. He says she should “reach out to her friends.” Oh no. He says she should stop thinking in terms of “if I can just get through this week” and instead resign yourself to your circumstances for an entire year. accept that it’s going to be like this and that you’re not in control. and that you might get moved down from 4th graders to 2nd graders. There is a little smugness in the way he speaks. The conversation is Bojack Horseman-esque. At some point: “Yabba dabba doo… How many people under 30 you think know about Yabba dabba doo?” I clock him at about 36.

i’m almost done listening. I finally look over at the couple expecting the man to be distinguished and the girl to be beautiful. Neither of those things are true. It’s because he’s short. Life is so cruel. i feel the urge to turn to them and say: “that was interesting. it was nice to meet you guys. hope everything works out.” but of course i don’t do that. it’s all the way dark now. i just get up and walk home.